Do you insist on yourself? Like I mean really, insist on your life, what you want for yourself and your future?
Ralph Waldo Emerson said:
“Insist on yourself; never imitate. Your own gift you can present every moment with the cumulative force of a whole life’s cultivation; but of the adopted talent of another you have only an extemporaneous half possession. That which each can do best, none but his Maker can teach him.”
I love this quote because it reminds me that the more I let go of the expectation of how that needs to look like, the more I experience joy and freedom in my life.
The other day I was walking past a dear friend after school drop off and she didn’t look her usual self. I stopped and asked if she was ok and I offered to hold space for her. I knew she needed to talk and express what she was feeling. I insisted that we do this because it was important even though she had another appointment to go to. The reality is, nothing is more important than our own healing. If we don’t allow opportunity to heal, we continue to accumulate more unexpressed emotions, and ultimately stop our ourselves from being all that we truly are.
I found a nice secluded spot under a tree and we sat down. I didn’t say much at first. I just held space by listening to her and being with her. I wasn’t thinking about what to say or how to support her.
She spoke, cried, pondered and cried some more. All the while she was releasing, making sense, and getting insights. With each layer of emotion released, she gained new insight and her eyes seemed to get clearer and brighter. A lot happened in that hour of us being there and letting whatever needed to be released, to be released.
Holding space for someone requires us to be aware of both our own self as well as the other person. Only then can we be the other person’s emotions without becoming absorbed in their emotions and feeling drained by their emotions. This is how healing happens.
I didn’t feel drained in any way. In fact, I felt energised and inspired because I too gained a lot from her emotional release. When we hold space for someone’s healing we also hold space for own healing.
In the case of my friend, she realised that the connection she longed for with others was what she needed to find within herself. This was a felt realisation, not an intellectual one. The message was also true for me. I felt it in my whole body, it wasn’t just an intellectual insight. It was deeper. It was also a confirmation that I was on the right track.
So, how do we connect deeper with ourselves? Start by insisting on yourself. Set the intention. Vouch for yourself. Trust yourself. And look at yourself in the mirror every day and I know that you’re enough and that you matter.
The more we hold space for ourselves and others, the more we’re able to receive what life has in store for us. Now that’s worth being for!
P.S. I’ll be holding space for women who are ready to receive more of what life wants to give them at The Empowered Woman Live Retreat, May 26th-28th. If you’re interested in finding out about this life-changing retreat then I invite you to book a connection call with me here. Early bird expires soon!!!